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  • Through my eyes nothing ever changes, through my eyes I've seen the pain, I look at the weeping grey clouds and often wonder at myself how the marvel of the worlds can be topped just by simple rain, perhaps others think this, or I'm the only one, but not only do I look at the rain, but I feel it, I feel the warmth, cold, hard, soft drops of droplets soak my hair, and muster my skin with its essence, I stare through the fields as the rain drips of the gutters, and soak the old wood that bear these fences, it seems simply enough to say its cold, but its complicated enough to say its comforting. I turn around and see you there in the field.
    I stand there, in utter silence staring at your beauty, an image in my head burning its memory like a faint calling of an echo against the walls, your voice whispers into my ears, like a ghost appearing before your eyes, the tingling sensation glides down my spine, as I feel the presence of you, I look away from you...there standing in the field, I glance away and stare down at a puddle forming in a small pit of grass rising above it like a pond, I stare at the reflection standing there looking back at me, I stare at his eyes, they look tired and weary, I start his expression, its sad and hopeless, I stare at his hair, I stare at his face its full of scars and rough textures, I continue to stare until another reflection appears, I close my eyes in frustration, as I my eyes slowly looks into yours, your clothes, your warmth, your smile, your eyes....I simply could stare in awe and shock, a sweet touch of your hand was all it took, I was defeated, I embrace you, the warmth and happy feelings came back and I stare into your eyes, I go up and close my eyes, and kiss you and feel your lips against mine, as the rain patted at our skins, the moment of eternity with all those years of suffering washing away finally, the final words finally came back to us.
    You're mine and always will be, with those words she told me...the world was at peace, and her essence consumed me in her embrace, tears dwelled in this fire burning eyes, as she stares into my eyes, I'm lost and without words, and she tells me everything's going to be okay...I look up to her, and I was about to say something until the an icy cold sensation grips my leg, I feel needles pulling at my skin downward into a puddle, I look back at her, I reach for her hand, she grabs mine, as I'm sinking in lower, she comes up to me, realizing I'm awaking, she hangs onto to me, as I embrace her, I look up and see swirls in the clouds and rain stinging at my face as I'm pulled down lower, I hang on as my body is about to succumb into drowning, I still feel her hands hanging onto mine, I open my eyes and its like I'm trapped below an endless water, she still hangs on as I'm continuing sinking lower to the darkness, my body is awakening but I never wanted it to end, I realize her hand is breaking through the puddle that swallowed me, I tug at her, and I slowly pull her down into the puddle, she frantically searches for me, I embrace her from behind, and she hangs onto me, as she smiles as we both sink lower into the darkness. into abyss we go, into the abyss of the unknown....

    I awake in my bed, staring at the ceiling, I open the shades and its dark outside and the rain is patting against the window, I get up and grab my watch and flick a button 4:09 am as the time blinks as my alarm goes off, I fumble with the watch and it drops, "fukkin damn" as I reach down looking for it in the dark, and I hear a grumble and some shifting noise, I reach tense up as the same feeling I felt from a the weird dream I had the night before, the noise was coming from my bed, I slowly reach for something and my hands came to a long metal rod, feels like the one I use for the Shop, I raise it above my head as I slowly reach down on my bed and I slowly reach down, a person turns over and says, "What are you doing!" I drop the rod at the realization it was her, in my frantic surprise the rod landed straight down onto foot, a yelp of surprise and I was on the floor holding my foot, then I open one of my eyes of amazement, and I see her there laying over the edge of the bed staring at me, her smile as I remembered it, she looks at me and smiles as she tilts her head, soon she realize she was on her back as I was hugging her, crying, telling her how much I've missed her, she just laid there holding me, comforting me....she said its only til sunrise so make it last....I held her, hugged her, I've smiled, til sleep over cumbered me, as my eyes were slowly shutting I told her, "please don't go", and I heard her whispered "I will always be here" as I fade out into sleep.

    I awake the next 4 hours later, I look over the where she laid, but see none, all I saw was her imprint on where she laid, and where the medal rod landed from last night, I smiled as I remembered her, and I get ready and walk out the door, with a cig hanging out my mouth and hands in my coat pockets as I walk down my steps and into the crisp cool air, with my head down, quietness is all it is in the morning, the occasional few bird and street sounds, as I walk around a corner, I am greeted with a throbbing pain to my face, and I'm on my ass, I look up and I see her there again, I get up and hug her again, she laughs and ask, "what's with all the hugging? and oh yeah I got you some coffee from the store. " I thank her as I explained to her what happened with the rain and the dreams, and her from last night, she smiled at this, and said see I told you I'll always be here, besides I got out a month early to be with you....and oh yeah guess who else is here, I look behind her and I see a small child in a blue bundled up jacket with a little stocking cap on as he looks up at me, and he holds out a piece of his candy.
    My eyes go wide and teary as I hold him for the first time, our son, our little boy, our lyric, I've been wanting to hold my little son since the day he was born, I was glad they both came back. I look up at her and gave her the 'look'...
    she responds with an innocent smile, "What?"
    I look at her and smile, "A phone call would of been nice"
    Its been about 10 months since I last seen her, almost a year of staying here and worrying about her. she looked at me and smiled....I grab our boy as we walk to the park, I look up and noticed the sun is shining through some clouds.




    The hopelessness consumed me, but she is my savior, my light, my heart, my soul, my only attraction, the days she's been gone, the torturous nights ravished my dreams with distant memories, and all those times she's been gone, she's standing here in front of me, with our child, with our light in this world, all those times I've been searching, all those times I've been missing, in this time was replace by grace and laughter, and those words she says to me that causes my heart to flutter, the presences was all it took to bring me back from my dreams and a nightmares. It was her and always been her, even after a rainy day, there's always sunshine.
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