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  • That didn’t take long. Did it?

    A couple of months ago on November 19, 2013, the arbiter of English words, The Oxford English Dictionary, officially crowned the word “selfie” as Word of the Year. Not-so-coincidentally, this was the same day when the “Millennials” (those born between the 1980 and early 2000) decided that taking selfies and posting them online was about as lame as mom and dad!

    All it takes is a bunch of old folks saying something is cool for the young folks to say “nah,” it’s not so cool. Of course, this phenomenon is not new. It’s been going on since Adam and Eve’s kids stopped eating apples. In fact, we old farts did the same thing when our parents started liking or DOING something we liked.

    For now, the anti-selfie backlash is running rampant among everyone except the doofus set, who can never get anything right.

    In an effort to test whether the allure of selfies is really kaput, I undertook a little experiment. I sent a selfie of me in a complete commando state to my better half’s mobile phone! Of course, there were some strategically placed items covering selected areas of my Adonis-like body. Needless to say, they were very LARGE items. Wink. Wink.

    After getting the pose just right and carefully covering the interesting parts, I sent this work of performance art to Sandy’s phone. This was a big mistake.

    When she got my sext, instead saying: “OMG what a hunk!” (which I modestly expected) she started laughing and couldn’t stop. She laughed so hard our dog ran under the bed. Tears of hilarity were running down her sweet face and she couldn’t catch her breath. I thought about calling 911 but I didn’t know what I would tell them caused these convulsions!

    Finally, some semblance of decorum was reestablished. Since she was due get a haircut that day, unbeknownst to me, she took her phone to the salon and showed it to the girls who work there. Upon returning home, she related that the same fit of hilarity enveloped this group of purple-haired, heavily inked hipsters. “I wish you could have been there. They…were…dying…from…laughing…so…hard!”

    Then she handed me $3.73.

    “The girls at the salon took up a collection to go towards your monthly fee at 24-Hour Fitness,” she said. And then she went into convulsive laugher again!

    As you might surmise, there will be no more risqué selfies from me. And if you know what’s good for you, you’ll follow the lead of your kids and stop taking those silly selfies too.
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