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  • I had a great show opening yesterday, I like my paintings and seeing them hanging there I want to paint much more and as long as I can. But the days just fly by me…

    Today my friend the shaman Tanya told me how during Tarot sessions she sometimes sees kind of shadows or whatnot and always on the left side, and they give her messages for the person in front of her and always it has been just the right one. It reminded me of when Shoshana told me that many of the hundreds of people she has accompanied to die, before leaving said they had seen dead family members who had come to meet them, and always somewhere up on the left side. I told Tanya that and she loved to hear it. She says when these things happen she sometimes gets afraid she might be going crazy.

    Tanya brought Saide, a Guatemalan who is a super shaman here. Her son was my son´s Julian´s friend and was strangled to death in Guatemala 12 years ago, just to steal his car. They were our neighbors. Saide´s husband had just died of cancer. I had never talked to her more deeply, but today I invited her and Tanya to eat in our restaurant, La Paloma ( My main work these days!!!) and she told us how for 2 years her son, Carlitos, who was 24 years old when he was killed, would visit her after his death until finally he said he could not anymore and now she is in peace. She has a center for all kind of alternative therapies here.Tanya then talked to us about Matriarchy and Patriarchy, a bit confused historywise it seemed to me, but altogether good. She is short and fat and black and a true character. Once she was my patient and then we became friends as happens with many. ( Uyy I have sooo many friends now and hardly any patients anymore!!!) See, I believe them their experiences and Saide runs around with Tibetan Buddhist monks and all. But I have not had such experiences myself and so I really do not know.

    I also kept wondering about what Graciela told me about the shadows or spirits she sees and even saw while we had lunch in the hotel the other day, I don´t know what to think. But she looked at my son Dani at the show opening yesterday ( Dani´s wife strangled herself to death nearly a year ago and I have written about this here on Cowbird. He often feels weighed down by guilt and I wanted Graciela to check out, if maybe Ulaís shadow is over him, even though I do not know if I believe in these things) and said that he is free of any shadow, Ulaí is not hovering above him and even though I do not believe in these ghosts, I feel very relieved. The End Of Her World

    We had a wonderful meditation this morning and when I left my office our psychiatrist was there above a young drunk man in front of the door. He was worried the man might be dead, but checked him out. The man sat up and asked for water. I gave him water, he drank so much that he had to vomit it. We discovered that his lips and one part of his face were extremely swollen. Marcus, the psychiatrist feared he might have broken his jaw. The man mumbled that a car had hit him but that was yesterday. Marcos said he needed to go to hospital. We asked him his name. Jorge Lopez Gomez. He said he had no family, was 28 years old, he was an orphan and lived in the streets and had been drinking for 12 months and he did not want to go to hospital.
    A hospital here does not accept anybody who does not have somebody to take care of him or her. Yes, they let them die in the streets. I called the Red Cross. The Ambulance came, two young very nice men checked him out. Jorge said he did not want to go to hospital. Marcus told him that if he did not he might die and I talked to Jorge, too and we got him to go.

    The Red Cross - Man was sweet, he called me a couple of hours later and told me that the jaw was not broken and Jorge had eaten and received treatment so as not to develop an infection.

    I called Graciela, who used to be a nurse in the hospital. She was great, she went there, to the hospital and looked after the young man and saw to it that he would not be sent back to the streets if he needed further care.

    He is okay, well as okay as can be in his situation. Tomorrow they will send him back to the streets. There is no asylum for people like these.

    His misery and loneliness really got to me, I even had to cry. What a world do we live in? He looked much younger than 28 as he said he was, he looked like a boy and you know: he never complained of pain.

    Graciela wants to see if we can open an asylum. We should. I should do much, much more. But I really do not know how. There is so much need. I did not care anymore if her spirits, Graciela´s I mean, are real or not, you know: she was right there to help and be loving!

    Later we saw a movie about the murdered women of Ciudad Juarez and afterwards my friend Amalia said she went to a monthly meeting that the womens´ group here organizes for the families of women who have been murdered. She said there were the mother and sister of a girl who was found raped and killed a few weeks ago , with all her intestines ripped out, not far from where my friend Christel lives. One of the cooks Amalia works with discovered the dead body right in front of her house. Amalia says she could not stay in the meeting, the sorrow of the murdered girl´s family overwhelmed her.

    Next month I will go to that meeting.

    Art by Kiki
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