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  • I must have finally left the shit part of town. I figured that because there was a Toys 'R Us. There are never Toys 'R Us in the ghetto. I don't know what compelled me to enter, but I did. Instantly, I began to get looks. At least I though I was. I felt like everyone knew who I was and what I had done. I imagine that's what a graffiti artists feels like with a bag full of paint when he is about to go bomb a spot for the first time.

    I kept reassuring myself that it was because of the ridiculous, mismatched and torn clothing I was wearing. I swore I was gunna get made real soon. That didn't stop me though. I grabbed a cart and became a caring father. I walked down the aisles and forced myself to think like I had a newborn at home.

    Diapers. Babies need diapers right? Goes in the cart. Cough medicine? Why not. Formula? Sure. As the cart grew, I came to realize that I had no idea why I was getting this shit. I need something that can get me through the night, after all, it was getting dark outside. So what to get? Applesauce, lots of applesauce. That shit is going out of style. Blankets, gotta keep warm right? I found some bedding, which was a great find.

    "Attention Toys 'R Us customers the time is now 9:30, and the store will be closing in thirty minutes. Please bring your final selections to the front registers for a quick and courteous checkout."

    Alright then, I gotta hurry. What else? Umm, a pillow would be nice. I had my cart loaded, but I did not checkout at the front registers. I had another idea. Walking around until I found a relatively secluded part of the store, I cased the store. I found a display case against a wall in the back corner of the store. With no one looking, I pulled the display away from the wall. Yeah, ill fit perfectly behind here. The back was pretty hollow, so I threw all my stuff back there.

    I pushed my cart down a few aisles before doubling back to the display. Once inside, I pulled it flush to the wall again. That next hour was nerve-racking, waiting for the customers to leave, hearing the announcements on the PA, and waiting for the employees to leave. Finally I could relax! Applesauce had never tasted so sweet.
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