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  • So you lied because she looks like you
    and because she looks like you
    that means you're stupid
    and because for so long
    that's what people have told you,
    that you're stupid.

    Probably dumb, probably ugly, probably useless, worthless and useless again some more.

    So clearly, logically, not hypothetically, but clearly and obviously, if she looks like you, then she is a lot like you. So surely she is stupid too.

    Or you lied because
    maybe
    after these many, many years you've finally embraced the truth about you
    and that must not have been easy
    in the Bible Belt
    Your unmasking was difficult, and of that she's quite sure. .
    Decades over decades of hiding who you really are.

    If there's freedom in truth, you've only broken one chain because there's a habit manifested. A delight or a cowardice that masquerades in petty lies about the past, about money, about your cons, your shams, your wrongs.

    Silly thing. If your therapist were a priest, he'd teach you to forgive yourself.

    If there's freedom in forgiveness, then maybe she will find freedom in forgiving you since you lied to her because she looks like you and therefore must be the same as you, lied to, and disregarded because so often, that's what people do simply because history has dictated they can.

    She thinks, therefore
    she is mad because you lied.

    First impressions are important
    And
    Liars never impress
    No matter how many sob stories accompany those lies.

    *******

    It's the beginning of the semester. Drops, financial aid and all the bullshit that accompanies the beginning of the semester bullshit are here.

    The biggest liars and toughest customers are those dependent on student financial aid who initially display no real interest or concern for graduation, school, and saddest of all, hold no appreciation for the lifetime bonding the collegiate experience offers, particularly with other students.

    Teaching discouraged people to find their voices takes a village of courage inside one little person's body. Only the determined soul survives long enough to drive through societal ills that are already out there and ain't going nowhere. Poverty, illness, hatred and discrimination are often experienced by students over and over and over again before they enter city classrooms as full or part-time college students.

    It takes much more than courage to encourage the discouraged to return to class once a new wave of academic and social discouragement rushes in.

    For some college professors, the courage may be money. For others, it may flexibility. But some days it may be actually really giving a flying fuck.
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