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  • So there was something today that really got under my skin. I almost feel as though it is really none of my business, but at the same time, I was a part of the experience, so technically, well, I don't know. Today was my friend's husband's first day at work, so while he was working I came to keep her a little bit of company and to give her a ride to the grocery store for things to make dinner for when he gets home. The whole two hours before he gets home though, she is a ball of nerves and keeps telling me that she is worried about Jon coming home. I really don't know why she would feel this way, but she had mentioned before about his temperament being very unpredictable, so I kinda just waited to see what she was so nervous about. Sure enough he comes home, fucking pissed - about God knows what. And I'm really confused, because she even had hot dinner on the stove for him. She was so hungry, but she wouldn't even eat cause she wanted to be thoughtful and wait for him, and all he can do is treat her like some dog that ripped up the t.p. while he was away. I am sitting on the couch in the next room listening to him yell at her, and that is when my blood starts to boil. I can feel my face get hot as my fingers start to violently shake. I refrain from saying anything, but I don't leave cause I'm afraid he will hit her. She is pregnant, and in the event that he hits her I will fucking kill him. So I just sit there and breathe, and I hear a stumble, and I hear her yell, "Put your hands on me again!"
    That's my cue.
    I go and put myself between them and declare cool off time.
    At this point I am fucking pissed. Because of a number of reasons:
    1. I am now involved
    2. This makes me a nosy, intrusive bitch in the eyes of pretty much everyone
    3. I really just care about my friend
    4. I hate to see her get treated like shit
    5. I'm mad at myself for not leaving sooner
    So he says were ganging up on him and leaves for a walk and leaves us to talk. All the time that he is away I can only think of how much the situation reminded me of my last relationship of three years. The way he screamed at her. The way she cried and pleaded, and the confusion in her hurt sobs. The feelings she described. And all I could think, is that I wish I could walk away for her. But I let her know that I support her all the way, no matter what, and I do. And I know that she wants to make it work with him. But there comes a time when you are worth more than the shit you are rolling in and you have to wipe the mud off your face and scrub the dirt from under your fingernails and wash all of your dirty laundry. And I don't care how glamorous your love for someone else, domestic violence is nothing luxurious and neither is getting treated like a dog, I don't care how seldom the case. I myself have been in a abusive relationship. And I wanted to make it work. I loved him. I blamed it all on me. And it was seldom, only happened sometimes. . . but after so long that shit builds up. It caves in on you and you can't even breathe. I am glad for the day I grew the strength to push it all off walk away - because now I am happier, I am my main priority, and I know what I am worth. I hope that whatever my friend decides to do that she is in a healthy environment for her and baby, that is all that really matters to me.
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