My friend George made an interesting comment on Facebook, following our reunion 2 weeks ago. I can’t find it now, but it was along the lines of “it was good to see some of my old friends – it was like finding a few more pieces of the puzzle that is me.”
That just rang so true to me. I know it was certainly like that for me, years ago, when I finally began to reconnect with my family, after a number of years of wandering around the world more or less on my own, trying to find my own way, almost intentionally distancing myself from them. There was that part of me that felt it necessary to do that, to discover who I truly was, without their influence. I wanted to do it on my own, be my own man, stand on my own two feet, say that I did it “my way”. When I got thoroughly lost in my search to be me, and the pieces of my puzzle were hopelessly scattered all about the place, helter-skelter like, and nothing made any sense, I found my way back home, lost and tired, and a few of the pieces began to fall back into place. I began to recognize the larger picture, and how each piece fit into it.
It seems that a similar process is happening in my life today, as I reconnect with many old friends from thirty, forty years ago. There once was a time that we found ourselves intricately woven into each others lives, and like family, we pulled each other through those times, those days, and became a part of each other in the process. Then, life cast us all to the four winds, and we went off to follow our dreams, our paths, our individual journeys, and we just lost touch, lost track of each other. In some cases, there were motives for moving on from each other – jealousy, betrayal, differing philosophies on life – in other cases, there were no reasons for it, just life, and time to move on, to leave the past behind.
There grew within me, a number of years ago, the desire to reconnect with a lot of my missing parts, my old friends. As that desire grew, the opportunities and ways to do it began to present themselves. Some, I picked up, and others I said, “No – not ready for that one, just yet.” Life has a way of making it all work out when the time is right. The recent re-connections have really been a blessing in my life.
It’s gratifying to find, upon reuniting with old friends, that the level of connection is a timeless one. Old friends are like hidden treasures. Finding them again so enriches your life. A few months ago, I was feeling really old and alone - my work and job situation had, temporarily, become such a priority in my mind, such a burden, and my unhappiness with it so disconcerting. I was really struggling with it.
As I have readjusted my thinking, and realized that work is only a part of the overall picture, and friendships and family and connection are so much more important, I have once again found my way back to trusting the universe, and feeling very much like I am a part of something so much greater, far vaster, than me. And, I have realized what I always knew deep down inside, but had just forgotten for that moment in time. I am not alone.
As the pieces fall back into place, a clearer picture of who I am slowly emerges. While still a puzzle, a mystery, I begin to recognize myself with a little more clarity, and come to trust the things I questioned not too long ago. And, to remember – it’s not all about me…a good thing to remember!