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  • Everyone said don't do it. You will ruin your relationship. It will never work out. Long distance relationships never work out. Well, what kind of advice is that?

    There is so much about relationships we learn from watching others. Engagements should be a year. Don't date someone for too long without getting married. Live together first. Don't live together first. But do any of these things really mean anything? Are relationships one size fit all?

    Sure, I miss him. But how can I call myself independent, how can I take advantage of my youth if I were to stay by his side? How can he take advantage of his opportunities? Of course, given the choice, I would rather be next to him. I would rather be next to him than anyone in the world.

    So here I am in Toronto at Ryerson University, finishing my Master's, exploring a new city and making great new friends. He is in Providence, at Brown, in the middle of his undergrad, making the transition from Marine to civilian.

    In a way I am glad. It might seem a little bit selfish. I want him to take advantage of everything. Have the real college experience. He is shy, and I am not. If I were around it would be easy for him to rely on being around my friends, sharing my life. I guess it is selfish because if we were to ever break up, I would never want him to look back and blame his lack of "fun" on me.

    I think of him every day. What helps is that he has known being away from those he loves before. Being in Iraq, he knows that life is transitory, and that real love will always be there. I will not say I am the word on long distance relationships, but so far, doing our relationship our way, in a way that works for us, is going well.

    And when I do get to see him, everything seems trivial. No talk of who does the dishes. To hell with the dishes.
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