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  • sometimes i miss living in the city - there is nothing like the particular satisfaction of surviving an urban environment. my life was hectic, and bad habits were easily justified. i enjoyed my vices. even if i did not actively participate in the events swarming around me, i was implicated in the excitement. i felt important. i felt infatuation. i took advantage of the many facilities: efficient public transportation, the availability of fancy grocery stores, the plethora of yoga varieties. i ate my share of sustainable produce at multiple dollars per pound. i was entertained, and occasionally bored by, famous artists. i attended a big state college. i dated, and broke up, and dated again.

    my lover created a container garden on the back cement steps. we were proud of our triumphant apartment farm and the bountiful, luscious heirloom tomatoes that grew bigger than our fists. we felt superior to nature, forgoing land and still creating fruit - but nature had more tricks up her sleeve than we knew. she flipped a switch to activate something primal in him and me. in the space of not many months we found ourselves in a small town, in a state not many people can locate on a map, married and pregnant and paying happy homage to the mortgage gods.

    sometimes it baffles me: what, when, where, why, how?! and sometimes i wish for certain conveniences, or that little particular something, that favorite cafe, that perfect pastry with origins in a country i'll never visit but could still enjoy, because urban living made it so. most times it simply stuns me that i've lived both ways in my short life - edgy, metropolitan, cutting-edge me and rounded, glowing, back-to-nature me are somehow both me. there's a wonderful balance to that idea, and i find the symmetry pleasing.

    but only in one place does the sun rise in the way i captured it in this picture, and that's here. i once lived one way, now another, and it's all so right.

    we are all marking time with pictures.
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