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  • Our airport was built in the 1930s at the urging of one of the town's movers and shakers. Let's just call him Hal.

    Hal was smart ... but Hal was wild.

    Hal reportedly photographed one of his girlfriends having sex with other men, then posted the photos inside the airport hangar.

    When I was a child, rumor was he gave all his women bright red convertibles as a present for their favors. Dad had us count them one time. We got up to 10 just in town.

    Hal's mansion had peepholes in the bathrooms so he could watch the ladies. Hal's mansion supposedly had windows in the side of the indoor pool so Hal could watch the ladies swim.

    At Hal's Thanksgiving parties, he'd stuff $20 bills down the fronts of the ladies' dresses just so he could grope a boob or two.

    Hal got syphilis. It ate away at his body. At his spine.

    Finally, the doctors gave him a choice: Have your spine fused so you stand up all the time or so you sit down all the time. He chose sitting down.

    And he dreamed of all the soft naked ladies he'd never have again.
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