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  • I mutter to myself everyday that I am an inconsequential white guy. I went to college. People tell me I am talented; I am smart; I am wise; I am fill in the blank. It's a sick game. I still can't get a real job with a salary. Isn't that what real American people do?

    My girlfriend has one.

    The people I report to always have one.

    How come I don't have one?

    * * *
    This week I am still working on that Jarritos pitch. I won't bore you with my "big ideas." My pie in the sky ideas. My 360 ideas. My ideas that tap into existing behaviors of Jarritos consumers.

    In one tactic, I suggested we award people for clicking a button. The award was as follows:

    * Mariachi band.
    * Life-size Jarritos pinata.
    * Trip to Guadalajara to visit the Jarritos factory.

    The senior account people said we should change the prize. They said the factory was more like a sweatshop. According to them, workers post comments about the horrible conditions on the company's Facebook Wall. The agency I am working for deletes them when they pop up.

    When I heard this I almost started crying.

    Maybe that's why I haven't landed a salaried position. I'm a baby stuck in a collared shirt.

    ** As of 12:00 p.m. PST, 01/11/2012, I have been relieved of my writing duties with the agency. **

    ** As of 3:44 p.m. PST, 01/11/2012, this story has been read by 36 people who may have noticed that Guadalajara was not capitalized =( **
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