Back then, I believed that all I need to endure one crazy intense, job free creative burst and all my dreams will come true. I takes much time and effort than it looks like in the beginning. So I quit my job in order to make this big, dramatic, heroic-quest thing about it. I spent a lot of time trying unsuccessfully keeping up with people in media who's got a big company/product/movie/whatever. I tried a lot of different things over the years, just to keep my career out of mediocrity. Some to do with business, some to do with the arts. Then, I escaped, shooting. I did it for really no reason, I did not need a reason in fact. I just did it because it amused me in an arbitrary kind of way. It was not going anywhere, this feature alone gave it its built in futility an edge. I did not have to impress anybody, and create something that just belonged to me, it gave me a complete sense of freedom for a change, that was liberating. like everything else, doing something worthwhile takes forever, however, I had time and the stamina to put in the hours.
Not until recently did it hit me that if I could find an extra hour or two a day, I can still stay creative and do my thing. All of these insights would have been lost in the depths, if I did not take that leap.