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  • Tomorrow I travel back to university.

    This summer has been a challenge. I feel I have changed so much in these past couple of months. I’ve been through a difficult break up and suffered the weeks that lead to it. I’ve had to retake half of my exams, taking away half of my holiday. I’ve felt alone. I’ve felt helpless and worthless.

    But I’m gradually coming out the other side. I’ve realised that everyone is beautiful and so am I. I’ve conquered a self-destructive habit that I’ve fought endlessly with for years of my life. I’m learning to treat myself with care and I now believe (truly believe) it is important that others do also. Before, I was so focussed on others and making sure everyone was happy that I forgot about myself and I let myself be both manipulated and looked past. Now, I see my worth.

    I used to keep silent if things were wrong. But I am no longer that frightened young girl with her mouth sealed shut; from now onwards I’m going to stand up for myself because I deserved to be treated right and cared for, and I shouldn’t settle for something less than the best out of fear that things will fall apart.

    On the one hand, I spend less time obsessing over what I say to people, endlessly trying to avoid causing any hurt/awkwardness… But at the same time, I am more able to see the beauty in people and the world around me. We all go through hard times, but everyone is wonderful and deserves to be loved and cared for.

    So I hope going back to university really will be the fresh start I am wishing for. I hope I will be able to repair things that are broken, make new friends, see more of the world, make the most of what there is to offer and, most importantly, I won’t forget to love myself.
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