Last year I was made redundant from my job with the council. Or maybe that should be The Council.
They had a redundancy scheme, and because lots of us were being made redundant this included Special Support.
So a bunch of us losers collected in the Council Chamber, where no doubt our special status had been voted through by the well-fed Tories of the Shire, and listened to a pep talk about how many other opportunities there were out there for us, if only we could manage to forget what losers we were.
A well-meaning woman (with whom I had worked, briefly, on a project) was droning on and on about some courses that were available for free, specially for losers like us, including project management, computer skills... at this point I nearly fell asleep but luckily I didn't because then she said:
"There's even a chainsaw course!"
At which I sat up.
Visions flashed through my mind of returning to County Hall, brandishing a chainsaw, and running amok in the corridors.
I went up to the well-meaning lady (who failed to recognise me in my loser-guise) after the talk finally finished and enquired about the chainsaw course.
She looked at me doubtfully.
"You have to explain why you want to go on it," she said.
"Because I want a Complete Change of Direction," I said.
I went on the course, and now I know how to dismantle, clean, sharpen and, of course, wield a chainsaw. Luckily I've never felt the need to run amok with it.