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  • She used to think she could handle anything. Was it arrogance? Or naïvity? Or was it simply the courage that is so closely linked to youth? Whatever it was, she seems to have lost or misplaced it. Alternatively, someone may have stolen it and replaced it with anxiety, hoping that she wouldn’t notice. Well, she has, and she wants her good old devil-may-care-attitude back. Even if someone else has been using it, even if all that’s left of it is a hollow shell, she wants it back. She needs it to cover up her sudden insecurity, her fear, her feeling of breathlessness.

    She was unprepared, full of confidence. She thought she was intrepid, invincible. As it turned out, she was just invincibly ignorant. It was the attitude, all along; I guess if you keep telling yourself you’re strong and rational, you start to believe it. Until, that is, someone pinches a hole in your imaginary self-confidence or robs you of it completely.

    She was so cocky, she thought depression and anxiety was something that could never hit her. And then, seemingly from one moment to the next, she became a shivering bundle of nerves, knocked out by inexplicable angst. What to do, she asks me; she can’t continue to live like this. I tell her she must find a way to fight it, but what do I know. I still think I’m Pippi Longstocking; I still firmly believe I can handle anything. Hell, I may even be the one who stole her attitude.
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