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  • In one study, it was found that by the age of 18 years,
    80% of girls of normal height and weight reported that they would like to weigh less.
    What about when those girls grow up?

    Dripping wet, I look out of the shower and see it there on the bathroom floor. It’s waiting for me today. It knows I have not been exercising enough and snacking too much. It’s days like today when I am taunted by The Scale. Days when I feel less confident than usual, when I have less strength to get through life’s little challenges. I am tired and stressed out too. The Scale preys on my weaknesses. It senses the rational-thinking wall of my mind is cracked. The Scale makes its move through the cracks and infests my mind in its fragile state.

    I step on its clammy black surface, knowing that I probably shouldn’t because the number I see will confirm my fears. How high will it be? The red dashes appear once, twice and three times. The next flash of red is a number. One hundred and ten point four. Okay. Not as bad as I thought. Seeing the point four is still a bit unpleasant. My period is coming soon so the point four must be because I am bloated. One hundred and ten is my max. It’s my number. It came from nowhere except my own comfort level. I picked it. I saw it on one of the health charts near the low end of “normal” for someone my height. It created an imaginary target. The edge of “comfort”.

    Comfort and normalcy battle it out in my head as I swing between being comfortable with my weight and looking normal. I sometimes wonder what looking normal is really like. The images of women I see in the media are not all that normal- especially the ones who have been airbrushed beyond reality. Their legs are lengthened and trimmed. Their breasts and lips are enlarged. Skin is washed clean of any blemish, pore or freckle. I know I don’t look like those images of “women”. Who are they really? Goals or monsters? Actually, I don’t really want to look like them at all. I just don’t want to look fat and I know I don’t. But I also know that some days, I can’t NOT weigh myself.

    I step off the scale. My towel wraps around me one and a half times. This should be another reminder of how small I really am. Instead I am thinking about which outfit will hide my belly.

    In one study, it was found that by the age of 18 years,
    80% of girls of normal height and weight reported that they would like to weigh less.
    (Jones et al, 2001) (retrieved from
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