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  • I know I am growing old, and this has something to do with it... but I also grow more eloquent and bold in the night. I lay in bed, transfixed on the ceiling fan, on curtains, wall, window too... and conjure up speeches. Imaginary confrontations that will happen soon, inevitably. Defense speeches for unpredictable situations... Or idealistic ones. I manage to stand up to the many sources of daily injustice. I say harsh words to my friends, strategic things at work, honest things at home - in well thought-out, well-styled speeches that go on and on in my head before I can fall asleep. Every night I defend a cause or two. I practice what I need to say, and sound organized, glorious and brazen. Winning speeches!

    Which never happen, or never happen that way. Or even turn sour the next day. Or are forgotten.
    Is the night better for rhetorics? Does it help to rehearse?

    At night a hero, at day a coward. I wish I could change it around. Command silence, be heard, have my words change things for the better, and even be quoted. But this is just another night speech. It is meant to stay in the night.
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