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  • Today was a good day, I had promised myself that I would go swimming, there's an adult only session on Tuesdays and that's my day off. Today I went, made a bit of a mess of things at the start, when I paid the bus driver I realised that the £5 note I thought I had was not there............ about £1.60 in my purse now and a swim is £2.75. Well I'm on the bus, deal with that problem when I get there.
    Nice bloke in the ticket booth, explain the situation he suggests I buy two tickets and keep one for next week, that way I can use a card to pay! Excellent and also I'm committed to next week now too. Half an hour and 30 lengths later I start to walk down to the harbour, there's a cafe just below the pool with a garden, looks over the sea and the sun is shining, how much is a pot of tea? £1.45, great I can pay that so another half hour reading in the sun.

    Finish the walk down to the harbour. Ilfracombe is a working harbour so nets and lobster pots everywhere. Walk up to the town along Fore street; next time I must bring my camera, on a sunny day like this the little alley beside the lifeboat station gives a great framed view, people sitting outside the two rival pubs in the sun and of course the bunting is still up from the Jubilee, a very jolly summer scene. I pass the 'sells everything' shop, basically a hardware shop but also sells knitting wool and sewing nick nacks along with a bit of furniture and carpeting upstairs, remember that I need a key to open my gas meter box, they have one left! "don't sell it, I'll go and get some cash" this is a shop we've been in a lot and the girl on the till has become a friend of sorts. she's amazed to hear what's happened and sympathetic, like everyone she thinks he'll be back, but I can't live my life on that basis. Great one more job ticked off.

    Mumford is out of cat litter, the pet shop or Lidl? Lidl will be cheaper and I need milk and a couple of other things, so down the hill to the sea front again and into Lidl. Cat litter incredibly cheap, but it's a big bag, can't miss a bargain I'll carry it home.

    Sunny walk home, about half an hour with 10kg of cat litter plus the other shopping! finally get home, it's lunch time, shall I sit in the garden? too complicated, still not letting Mumford, out so have lunch on the sofa. Housework for a couple of hours then I have a doctors appointment, suddenly realise I'll be late, run down to the doctors, made it just in time, doctor gives me a leaflet about a depression and anxiety service. Back up the road again, heat up the cup of tea I had no time to drink, nice cuddles from Mumford. Make an appointment with the counselling service, good that will help a lot.

    Read a great story here which sums up what I felt about the ex.......
    Still feeling good, achieved a lot. Called the Driving Instructor and booked my first lesson! scary.

    Then............ sent an email to him, telling him about the story, shouldn't do that! Asked him to return a key he has to my mother's house and tell him about the counselling.

    His reply arrives- cold - business like - indifferent. Why do I do this to myself.............

    It was a GOOD day, it still is I WON'T let him ruin it. I need more days like this, full of things to do and little pleasures like the cup of tea at the Larkstone Cafe, swmming is great therapy too, up and down counting the lengths, not really thinking, and it's definitely my thing, he doesn't enjoy it.
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