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  • If you asked me to describe myself in two words, I'd say hopeful and upbeat. But there are times when I am depressed and miserable, like now. I forget there's someone shining a steady light on the dark recesses of my spiralling thoughts, an amazing friend who is right now holding me together.

    He brings out the real me. When we met, I was a 40 year old middle-classed divorcee. He widened my horizons. Once again I became rebellious and unconvential, having been introduced to Indie music, Hunter S.Thompson and much else my mother would not approve of.

    He spends time with me. I'm invited over to hang out regularly; more so lately since he knows I'm having issues with my landlady and I'm lonely after splitting with my boyfriend.

    He helps me out with any spare food or money he might have if I need it. He knows what its like to be broke before payday.

    I benefit from his good humour, positivity, and razor-sharp brain. He gets me laughing no matter what mood I arrive in. He saves cool music and interesting things to show me. He's a good listener (and advisor when asked) when I need to be serious and pour out my heart.

    We're completely comfortable in each other's company. I curl up and relax in the guest chair with a cup of tea, and know I am accepted and valued. We've been through a lot together in the last eight years. We know each other nearly as well as we know ourselves.

    So it's funny to think that until nearly two years ago, he was my soul-mate and the love of my life. For seven happy years we shared a bed, secrets, good times and bad. When we broke up, I thought my heart would never heal. But we talked a lot and learned a lot, and came out the other side with no blame and our close friendship intact.

    I do think its very sad that, when a relationship ends, so many throw away the 'best friends' bit. Maybe for some, pride and dignity get in the way. Others perhaps find it impossible to talk over what went wrong with each other in a mature fashion. Sometimes there's a lack of understanding that there are always two people responsible for the break-up. My life would be a much poorer one without the rich friendship my ex-boyfriend and I have. And so today is a good day, the day I remember to celebrate my amazing friend.
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