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  • What I learned to do, here at Cowbird, was to write about what I was going through in my life. Here, you were invited to write to make sense of your life. By reading some of the other storytellers I found when I came here, like Benjamin Weinberg and Kathy Weinberg and Alex Noble and Diane Jardel and Barbara Jo, Jari Jarvela, Burt Kempner, and many, many others, I learned that writing is a process, that there was a way to sit down and, starting with a thread of a thought, to follow that thread to a conclusion that you didn't know was there until you began writing. It was called the creative process.

    I discovered things about myself that I previously didn't know - wonderful things, sometimes surprising things, when I skimmed through the surface thoughts, and got down, well below the surface, and allowed the deeper, inner thoughts to bubble up to the surface, through this process. Cowbird taught me how to do that. Cowbird taught me that I could do that, and not be alone with those thoughts, and through sharing them here, I was actually inviting others to share some of theirs, too.

    For this, I will be forever grateful to Cowbird, and to those responsible for its creation, and nurturing through the years, mainly Jonathan and Dave Lauer.

    I was alerted to Jonathan's story by Andy Rz yesterday, mid-morning, as I was at work, taking care of business. I didn't have a lot of time to process it, then. I made a number of comments, as I was able, between meetings and other business. I had a meeting I had to go to after work, and didn't get home until after 9 last night. I posted a story that didn't seem to go out on e-mail distributions, so I "retold" it before I went to bed, and still don't know if it went out beyond those who look on the community page. Just Cowbird being quirky again, like it so often does. I don't mind. I'll just keep writing my way through this process.
  • There's no quick and easy exit for me, here. I have too much invested here. I went "all in" when I found Cowbird, and I am incapable of just shooting out a happy "farewell, see ya later" story here, and calling it a day. I'm doing much better this morning than I was last night. I've had the chance to sleep on it, and a little more understanding is creeping into my pyche about it. I get it. It is time.

    But, as long as they'll give me the time, I will process my letting go of this thing that has held me rather spellbound for nearly 5 years. Man, have I loved it here. I've loved being a part of your community, and have loved being part of welcoming so many others to it.

    We've been through some shit together, here. Some real shit. Life shit. Where else on the internet have you had the opportunity to do what we've done here? Oh, there are many places to tell stories, and many places to be part of communities, and I have availed myself of many of them, and they have their place. But, my friends, they are not this place. This place was, and is, different. There will never be another place quite like it. I believe that is all due to the special intention that was put into creating it (Jonathan and whoever else had a hand in that), and the sometimes heroic effort that it took to keep it up and running (Dave).

    You guys did good. Really good. Well, I gotta go live my life, get ready for work, and do what I do. To be continued.
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