Forgot your password?

We just sent you an email, containing instructions for how to reset your password.

Sign in

  • I do believe in the life of the spirit. I believe that there is a whole dimension to life that we, for the most part, barely scratch the surface of. We all have the ability and capacity to go deeper and broader into this realm of spirit. It’s just not real easy for most of us to do.
    Like anything in life, it requires belief and practice to make it anything resembling meaningful.

    Belief can be a difficult thing, for a lot of reasons. It’s gotten mixed up with a lot of the dogma of organized religions that many of us have sought to escape. Anything related to spirit is o.k., as long as you prescribe to a particular version of how that world is regulated, many of them want me to believe.

    Anyone of independent spirit will naturally rebel at that type of an arrangement. I am told to believe that certain things are true, and I’m supposed to have the “Faith” to believe it because you said it is so, or because a book said it is so?

    I have a problem with that. Books can be easily manipulated by men for a variety of reasons, not all of them spiritually based. I saw this happen in the writing and publication process of a Basic Text for Recovery from addiction of a certain global recovery program. Politics got involved, and some who sat in a “front office” of that organization took the inspired collaborative work of many who spent years on the task, and dumbed it down, tweaking a few key principles that altered the entire nature of those principles, and the text.

    What ensued was something called the “tradition wars”, which still rage on today, 30 years later, at least that's what appears to be going on there. Knowing what I knew, I could no longer subscribe to what they were selling there. I fortunately didn’t even have to walk away from it – they kicked me out. I belonged to a group that did not subscribe to the altered version of the tweaked principles, so they removed our meetings from their meeting list. It saved me the dramatics of walking away. I had no meeting to go to, so I just didn’t go. It was time to move on, anyway. Many years later, some tried to lure me back into “the fold” on a number of occasions, but I have always known in my heart that I no longer belonged there.

    Likewise, I am told to believe what is in the Bible. The question is, which version? Whose interpretation? Oh, and by the way, just ignore all of those chapters that were conveniently buried for centuries in a cave (Nag Hamadi) because they were politically inconvenient or incorrect at the time? It just never added up in my mind. Something just didn’t smell right there, for me. I have a hard time buying what they’re selling in that book – whatever version is being put up as the one inspired by God.

    I was raised in a particular faith, Roman Catholic, but by the time I reached an age in which I began to really think and reason things out for myself, I just couldn’t buy the whole package of what I had been raised to believe. Again, it just didn’t all add up, for me.

    All that said – I have always believed in the life of the spirit. There was always something there that I could feel. I’ve had certain connections to people that seemed to operate on this other level. I have felt the presence of spirit that only makes sense if there is a spiritual realm. I know it to be true.

    After trying every other possible way to recover from addiction, it was only when I came to rely on the spiritual that I was provided with complete recovery from that affliction. The struggle was simply lifted from me, when I surrendered and allowed this to happen. I only know what I experienced.

    The time and place that I can most effectively explain what happened to me is when I am talking with someone who is similarly suffering from a similar affliction, be it addiction or some other problem that has them feeling completely trapped or defeated by the struggle. Then, sometimes, my description of what happened to me might help them. You never know whether it will or it won't, but it's pretty hard not to throw a drowning man or woman a life raft when you're sitting in the boat, safe and dry.

    That’s how I was able to experience it. Someone who had been there shared their experience with me, threw me a raft. It just resonated, and they made it clear that all I had to do was surrender, be open to the spirit, rely on it, and climb on into the boat. I believed what they were dishing at that point, and addiction left me. Just like that. Hasn’t returned in 28 years. The boat's great. Warm and dry.

    That, I believe.
    • Share

    Connected stories:


Collections let you gather your favorite stories into shareable groups.

To collect stories, please become a Citizen.

    Copy and paste this embed code into your web page:

    px wide
    px tall
    Send this story to a friend:
    Would you like to send another?

      To retell stories, please .

        Sprouting stories lets you respond with a story of your own — like telling stories ’round a campfire.

        To sprout stories, please .

            Better browser, please.

            To view Cowbird, please use the latest version of Chrome, Safari, Firefox, Opera, or Internet Explorer.