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  • for a long period of time now i've been avoiding everything that hurts. i've made it a perfect world where there is no one who i care a lot because if there is one you tend to be vulnerable.

    i remember those days when i felt lost and rejected. i cried and begged for my heart to be cold...

    so it's cold now. i feel nothing. it is like the feeling muscle has atrophied as i do not use it.

    i can't love. i'm jealous for those people who can even though they may suffer.

    i want to be hurt now. i want to feel it. i want to love. i want to suffer.
    now i know all those emotions makes you a human being, it makes you alive.
    but it's so hard to broke through those walls i've been building carefully...
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