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  • (1) I could not control my laughter
    (2) I felt confused
    (3) My mind was flooded with thoughts
    (4) I felt supremely happy
    (5) I felt unsteady and uneasy
    (6) I felt more alert and alive than I have in a long time
    (7) I felt on the fringes of sheer horror
    (8) My hearing seemed to be sharper than usual
    (9) I felt cold or had chills
    (10) The walls and floor moved and flowed
    (11) I felt as if I were floating in space
    (12) I actually seemed to return to certain moments in childhood and experiencing myself there
    (13) I heard things that I knew were not real
    (14) I felt anxious or tense
    (15) People thought what I said was not important
    (16) I felt like I was shaking or trembling
    (17) Walls or other objects seemed to be breathing
    (18) I felt I might become permanently insane
    (19) Solid objects changed their shapes and even disappeared
    (20) With my eyes closed I saw multicolored moving designs
    (21) I could make an object turn into something else just by wanting it to
    (22) I felt as one with those around me
    (23) Colors seemed to be brighter
    (24) I felt separate from everone and everything
    (25) I felt a sense of wonder, joy and peacefulness in the world
    (26) I felt upset and distraught
    (27) At time I felt as if I were being persecuted
    (28) Music affected my mood much more intensely that usual
    (29) I felt something dreadful was about to happen
    (30) I became another object or another person and yet remained myself
    (31) Put ashes in metal containers
    (32) I am more satisfied with life in general now
    (33) Snuff matches carefully. Don't throw them into wastebaskets
    (34) One side of my body felt different from the other side
    (35) Watch for breaks or wear in lamps and appliance cords
    (36) I saw all the mysteries of the universe in certain objects
    (37) Have fireplace screen to check sparks
    (38) I saw myself as I really am, and I did not like what I saw
    (39) Don't let grease accumulate on stove
    (40) I was easily distracted and not able to control my thoughts
    (41) Who likes Chinese fortune cookies anyways?
    (42) Always inspect stove before leaving house
    (43) Use electric candles to handle your parties' lighting problems
    (44) I felt choked or found it hard to breathe
    (45) At times I had the sensation of someone spying into my mind
    (46) My head ached
    (47) My head ached
    (48) Always inspect stove before entering the house
    (49) I had a strange taste in my mouth
    (50) I felt depressed
    (51) Watch your stove pipes for de-fects
    (52) I had a wonderful sexual fee-ling
    (53) Don't you throw flour, uncooked cereal, or dust into the stove
    (54) I had treble understanding what was be-ing sad
    (55) The whole experience seemed to have a good electrician
    (56) I wanted to sit and snuff matches carefully
    (57) Be sure electric circuits are a greater part of my life
    (58) I felt the people her understand me
    (59) Keep plenty of decorations at parties to affect what I hear
    (60) This was like a bad 18 inches from the wall, and cover wall with sheets of asbestos, and put it in safe place to cool self-accepting

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    This was one of my early attempts to put pictorial information together with text. We are talking July 1983, in the magazine PROP, offspring of the artists collective WORKSPACE in Albany, New York that I was part of. The magazine faltered in 1986. WORKSPACE did not last beyond 1980 but its offspring is everywhere. The piece appeared under the same title, My First Memorial Weekend.

    Cowbird, thirty years ago, and nobody to share with, and nobody to 'love'!
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