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  • "If this is, what I think it is," the nurse said "I have only seen it in my study books."

    I looked at my wife. Just a minute ago we were a happy parent couple, looking forward to the first glimpse of our third child.
    "Conjoined Twins," I said. I knew right away something was wrong. I had seen a vague shadow behind the image of the child, but there was a heartbeat. At first I thought it had something to do with the device being a bit worn down. The second thought striking me like a sledge hammer was TWINS. But the moment the nurse spoke, I knew something was very wrong.
    "That's correct," the nurse replied "you must be in shock. I have never seen it before in my life myself. You are facing a dreadful dilemma."
    "What dilemma?" My wife got herself together amazingly fast. "If these children have no chance to live a normal life, there is no choice. We will not keep them."

    So here we were nine weeks into our fourth pregnancy, the first was a miscarriage, and the other two brought us two healthy boys. We just came home from England where we had been on a two week holiday with friends from Devon and my wife was feeling extremely tired and sick. During the trip I noticed a strange red and blue circulair shape on her bottom. Not instantly worrying me, but still something she should go see a doctor for after we got home.

    The nurse added. “It is a very special Siamese twin, they seem to have everything except an own heart.” But she explained she couldn't exactly tell how the two embryos were connected, so she suggested we should contact our midwife and have an extra examination in the hospital with one of the best echoscopists in town.

    Outside just before unlocking our bikes we embraced each other and we cried. We stood there and just cried and cried and cried. People passing by must have guessed something was wrong with our pregnancy, as the care center is well known... if only they knew we had just become a chance of one in a million.

    The next few days were like a dream or a movie, it wasn't really us. Spreading the news was awkward, the reactions were overwhelming.

    We visited our midwife. She said she turned over her car as soon as she heard the news. She had been helping mothers in labour for over fourty years and over 8000 pregnancies. But this was the first time she came across a conjoined twin.

    We visited the famous echoscopist who was evenly moved by the images, it was her first time too. She gave us the images and video’s. Something she had never done before and was actually against hospital rules, but she felt this was the time for an exception. I guess she was right. She explained it was indeed a conjoined twin with just one heart. Chances of survial past the 20th week were next to nothing, the embryos would never be strong enough. Should they survive, chances of death during labour pains we even higher and in the end there would never ever be a chance to separate them at all.

    To be absolutely certain we visited an academical hospital with the best medics in the land. We were in and out within half an hour. No comfort or nothing. Just the message that it had been diagnosed correctly.

    The next day my wife was in the hospital and a few hours later the twins were nothing but a memory. We felt empty. Later that week my wife was diagnosed with the Lyme Disease by our doctor. Remember the strange red/blue ring I discovered? She got it from an infection after a tick bite. So she went on antibiotics for three weeks. Such a heavy dose would have never been given to a pregnant woman. Was it all coïncidental? Did the babies have to go, so my wife could be cured? A little over a year later my wife gave birth to our beautiful daughter Dunja.

    I still feel blessed we got these breathtaking images of the twins. They will always be a part of our life and somehow it’s both sad and yet beautiful. Two human beings with one heart. It almost sounds like the kind of bond or connection we are all looking for. Soul mates.
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