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  • 1.

    It was as if god shattered
    herself into a billion pieces
    splintered her name into
    infinite vowels and secreted
    herself in grass and trees
    in rocks and people in birds
    and lizards and bumble bees.


    She played this game of
    hide and seek in which
    she searched for herself
    again and again
    in the faces of Others
    in ignorance she birthed
    herself into samsara
    and experienced love
    as if it were the first
    time and death as if
    it were the last.


    In countless lives
    for endless eons
    she wept at graves
    and wedded her
    beloved raised children
    slaughtered her enemies
    villain and victim
    saint and sinner
    the whore and
    the virtuous nun
    she assumed all
    roles like a virtuoso
    she performed
    with gusto
    until she even
    her avatar
    her character
    with her Self.


    One day
    she tired of the game
    the peek-a-boos
    the roller-coaster
    the valleys and peaks
    death and rebirth
    she searched for signs
    prayed for omens
    until through grace
    or fortune she awoke
    and pieced together
    the mystery of
    her Self and realized
    that though a chorus
    of women were singing
    in truth there was only
    a singular singer
    it was herself
    in every face
    in every gaze
    in every voice.


    She cried for
    once she had
    conceived herself
    as only a fragment
    a missing piece
    a lost jigsaw
    a wounded shrapnel
    but now she understood
    her wholeness
    her holiness
    finally she remembered
    her name.

    (Public mural on Hayes St. near Gough in SF)
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