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  • The Black Hole waits for me once and again. The Not - Wanting - To Get - Up. The Thinking and Thinking: I am old. I am worthless. I have not done anything valuable in my life. My life is worthless. I am ugly....

    I guess every person in any culture in the world, when he or she fall into the Black Hole, they think these thoughts in tiny variations....

    Then I force myself to get up, shower, dress, go out...

    and I meet people or they meet me or who can really say what happens.

    His wife, a gorgeous, loving, gifted young woman , he has suddenly found her dead. He had spiritual beliefs and they are shattered now. He cries. I sit. I do not have beliefs. I can just be there and listen and maybe say this or that word that my heart gives free.

    She tells me that her daughter is very sick, weaker by the day, and has decided to stop eating and die. She is clear and in peace, she, the daughter, she the mother is torn from here to there. The hardest and also most wonderful thing that might happen between a mother and a daughter.

    Another one tells me about how she feared to be there when her brother finally died and then it was exactly her who was there and did all the right things and said all the right words....

    All these tragedies and acts of love endured and committed by people you might cross in the street and think absolutely nothing of them and now I am allowed to realize all their big hearts....once and again it is this and just this, which lets me climb out of the Black Hole...

    Life is dark and hard and cruel and beautiful and always a surprise and the word MAGIC shows up in heart and mind again, sometimes after very long draughts.

    Do not lose hope!


    Floreana Island, The Mystery Island, in Galapagos.....( Wonderful documentary GALAPAGOS AFFAIR!!!)

    by Kiki
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