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  • Facebook post (March 12, 2014): "Look who just woke up!"

    That's my granddaughter, Lindsey, with her 18 month old baby boy, Riley. They are so gorgeous! Even though Riley has his little "just-got-up-from-my-nap" look, Lindsey's delightful expression says enough for both of them.

    Sadly, it was her last post. A short time after taking this selfie, Lindsey was killed in a car accident. She tried to brake for slow traffic and lost control of the car. It went off the road and rolled 150 feet down an embankment. She was killed instantly, but Riley survived without a scratch.

    I didn't realize until I wrote this memoir that I stopped writing for almost a year after she died. I didn't even really know how much it hurt, because it was the kind of thing that is so huge that you cannot take it all in at once. You sort of have to let it seep in a bit at a time, or it feels like a tsunami that will sweep you away. I will write more about her later. I am just now getting to the point of acceptance.

    Meanwhile, here's a favorite memory. We would ride together in my car with the sun roof open and the music blaring. Our favorite at the time was "Bleeding Love" by Leona Lewis. We sang at the top of our lungs! Grandma in her 70s, Lindsey becoming an adult. It was joyous!

    Oh, Lindsey! You filled me with your energy, baby girl, and gave me moments of recaptured youth. That was your gift. You filled all the space around you with your own creative energy. It was mesmerizing and contagious! You woke the place up!

    "So I keep bleeding, keep bleeding love
    You cut me open!"

    And that's a good thing. We all need to keep bleeding love for one another!

    I miss you.
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