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  • i’ve stopped writing.

    there are lots of different reasons for this. the main reason is, there is just too much upheaval going on right now. major changes taking place. rugs being yanked from beneath my feet. the kind of stuff that i thought i knew and believed in,

    all gone. a lie.

    soooooo difficult, because the core i built on is suddenly full of termites and collapsing.

    i can’t really talk about what is going on because this is far too personal. what i am trying to deal with is my own anger, hurt and rage i guess this insanity will pass and things will get better. for now, i’m stuck in limbo and don’t know if or when it will get better or worse. one lousy day at a time, one lousy step at a time, three lousy steps backwards at a time, in a cramped, tightly wound, circle of chaos.

    my husband and daughter are fine, i’m fine too, (really, i am) yet i’m so deeply disappointed. i just can’t seem to do right or make it better, because, ultimately i have no control over this bag of worms. this condition exists and victimizes everyone who tries to help.

    to me, this is like dwelling in a kind of purgatory for dysfunctional reality. i know we all go through trials and tribulations - but please, if there’s a merciful spirit up their in the clouds, will you give it a rest?
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