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  • This is the story of how I met my husband, Vigneswara Rao or better known as Vicky.

    I met Vicky through an online app in July 2013. He sent me a message and he said to me later, that he was surprised that I replied back. In his mind, Chinese girl don’t usually go for Indian guys, as most times his messages are ignored.

    We then started chatting, and after awhile, met up for the first time. We were already friends for 5 months when we decided to date each other.

    I had many Indian friends but had never dated an Indian guy before. My Chinese friends were shocked that I had started dating an Indian guy. My Indian friends, on the other hand, knew that I was comfortable with any race.

    When I told Dad, Leong Hua Thon about Vicky, he was stunned and he asked me, “Why do you have to pick an Indian guy?”. As a traditional, protective Chinese father, he then proceeded to ask me a million questions, "What does he do? Does he have a good job?"

    He had heard about the stereotypes on Indian men being drunks, and he was fearful that Vicky would be one.

    In 2014 during Chinese New Year, I decided to introduce Vicky to my family and relatives. As my family members are not well-versed in English, I told Vicky to speak to them in Malay. When he met everyone, he was treated so well, like an important guest in the house. My uncle even offered him a beer - something that rarely happens unless the person is a VIP!

    My siblings and cousins then proceeded to convince Vicky to gamble, "Come puah kiao with us (gambling)!". He played for a few hours with them, and everyone grew fond of Vicky from that day onwards. After that, Vicky would visit me often in my house, as he grew closer to my family.

    My Mum, Sang Fui Lian, initially, had a culture shock about Vicky, but now, she loves to see Vicky and approves of our relationship. She is often cooking and feeding Vicky with all her Chinese dishes - even cooking special dish requests from Vicky. Often, I joke with my friends, 'if you wanna see my Mum's love for Vicky, just see his growing tummy."

    At times, the first thing she would ask me after getting home is, "Is Vicky coming tonight?".

    Vicky's parents are divorced but remarried to a new spouse. Both sides of his family treat me well, and have adopted me into their family. Like my parents, Vicky's parents are often cooking Indian food for me, and buying Indian clothing. His family is totally open-minded with having a Chinese daughter in law.

    Once, his Dad, Nookarajoo, confessed to me that he was very happy that Vicky had picked me. According to him, Vicky used to be a "trouble maker", but has since changed for the better since meeting me.

    It's not all good news for Vicky though.

    One day, Vicky accompanied my Mum with her shopping. They were at a sports fair and Mum was looking to buy some sports shoes.

    A Chinese aunty came over and asked Vicky: 'Ini stock dalam ada lagi ah?' (Do you have more stock for this shoes?)

    In a puzzled state, Vicky and my Mum just looked at the lady. The aunty then continued saying: ''You cari kasut untuk Aunty ini kan?'' (You're finding a shoe for this Aunty right?)

    Feeling annoyed, Vicky almost exploded and replied, 'She is my mother in law!!' The Aunty was embarrassed and walked away. Of course, when Vicky told me, I burst out laughing but he wasn't amused, of course.

    I am really thankful we have a supportive family on both sides, who give us a lot of love and support. This year, in February, we finally tied the knot. We're excited to be discovering new things about each other's culture.

    Story of May Fen & Vicky for The Chindian Diaries
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