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  • So let’s take a moment to think. Because in thinking we can force our wisdom to grow stronger, apparently. But thinking is less simple than you know. Our mind is like a maze. Full of roads to nowhere, empty pathways and dead ends. The ground is marble in this maze, pure white with granite inlay. But its beauty and purity is cracked. Our mind has good thoughts, because in our heart we want to have thoughts…but if we think in too much depth, we can be swallowed by the thoughts we are trying to avoid. The horrific thoughts. Judgment, loneliness, Jealousy- these creatures destroy us. I can tell you this much, when you are sitting in your room at two o’clock in the morning with a deafening silence molesting your ear drums and a painfully cold sting in the atmosphere, your mind only follows one path in the maze, the path into a self-destructive burrow. In this part of the maze, the ground is covered by a blinding mist.
    Agony is not felt with the senses, it is felt in the mind and reflected in the spirit. As humans, we can only feel the amount of pain that our mind lets us feel. If we lose control of the pain that breathes us in, we journey into agony. If we let this grotesque creature swallow us, our souls develop into something that is not connected to our body. When we lose this relationship between our physical being and our soul, we become insane, as we no longer have control of ourselves. We are lost. I’ve felt this disconnection before, but this time I have formed an acceptance for the pain that traps me in, as I know where I stand and I know I have no force of power against it. The agony that once buried me is now my only form of sanity.
    I have formed a connection to the torture, and in most cases I find myself enjoying it. I enjoy the torment. It excites me. I lean on every movement and development of the ache as it has given me a purpose. But my purpose has become repetitive, it has evolved into an existence. When I walk no footprints are left. I have faded.
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