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  • work and business
    what i love about it is the challenge
    and in my work as an electrician i am challenged
    all the time

    its not challenges that require creativity to solve
    its syntax and structural mathematics
    ironically i get most of that pretty easy
    often is the craftsmanship of keeping lines straight and tight that i get knocked for

    but i find myself wanting to run to the mountains
    to shake this dust from my hair and waste my rotted toolbelt
    if i am going to wear clothes then i want to wear nice cloths and feel dapper
    if i am going to be challenged then i want my challenge to take me somewhere

    so i listen to podcasts
    i text with friends
    occasionally i smoke a bowl and melt away the day with the distorted wails of Thee Oh Sees
    and then i come home mental pudding and useless

    during the day while the brain is transforming into primordial sludge
    i resist it thinking i should be doing something else
    something more meaningful and meeting my purpose
    i feel like i have paid my dues and i should be soaring by now

    and that evil should is most likely exactly why i am still paying those dues
    it does seem that once i let go that the freedom focuses all the angels and blessings
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