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  • I am in the 4th month of my 77th year on this grim globe. About 35 years ago I became more conscious of my state of mind. Ideas and desires would race through it whether I was awake or going to sleep. I was living with an experienced nurse then who suggested that I consult a psychiatrist.

    Only one good thing came from that medical experience. I read most of Dr Peter Whybrow's A Mood Apart. From that I realized that I was either a cyclothimic or a medium bipolar. But I also learned that I wasn't sick nor was it likely that I would be committed.

    Yes I have done some crazy manic things, but I never went completely off the deep end! I have spent days and weeks withdrawn into moods of feeling depressed about myself and how I had failed at so many things till then. But I survived my craziness and depression, seemingly not the worse for wear.

    The other day, I realized that I have never had more $$$ in the bank and am free of debt for probably the first time in my life. I am happy about that accomplishment, especially when I read that many retirees like me, who live in the Western World are deep in debt. No doubt moving to China has made this possible. Oh, I spend $$. I have a Macbook Air (which I am using to write this story), an an iPad and sort of a smart phone. I have a full liquor cabinet, like any good bipolar, and lots of good wine.

    Why is it that I want to write about my bipolarism today. Strangely it seems to affect my libido. When I am in an up mood I am likelier to seek sex, or find ways of pleasuring myself. When the mood is more intense my sex episodes are more frequent.

    Lst year around this time I got involved with another Chinese woman. She was slight of stature, not overly pretty, but in some way communicated her sexuality. She was a good kisser, on lips and on my nipples. I enjoyed one blow job with her and it was heavenly. But my wife came back home and that was that. No doubt this gal was on the make. My wife insisted that the police were after he because she had squeezed a fair sum from a Pakistani man. His family intervened and she, the fey one, ended up in prison, or that's what my wife says.

    I would do a lot to meet her again, especially now since my libido is active and my mind casts back to bedding Z,,,g N.. She had a fierce temper though and no doubt she would have made my life hard!

    It is a bit crazy here, the foreign men and local women thing. They are on the hunt and we are susceptible. They tend to use all their sexuality to get what they need, $$$ usually, or the chance to get to Canada or the US. It is a usual thing to see a Caucasian man with a much younger Chinese woman on the street or at parties.

    Now about aging. Yes there are times that I feel more feeble, especially in my legs and with my eyesight. So far this process has been gradual and not overly challenging. But I can sense that I will eventually have difficulty walking and reading. Then there is hypertension and diabetes milletus. It is difficult to follow a proper diabetics diet here. When I went for a physical a few weeks ago, the cardio guy said that my heartbeat was not normal.

    I don't think that I will live in China in a feeble condition or with serious medical complications.

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