People often ask me how old I was when I was adopted.
I was born on December 5th, adopted on December 8th.
Lisa spent three days with me before the adoption agency transferred me to my parents.
There was never a gap in time in my memory - I knew no other life than the one I had with my parents. I didn't remember those three days.
Now I see something in these pictures with Lisa that I didn't before. I see the beginnings of our relationship - the one that we have now. I see a bond that can surpass time and distance.
I never thought I'd be saying these things. In fact, the whole idea of getting in touch with my birth mother made me pretty uncomfortable. I always felt like my parents were all I should need and saying otherwise would be some kind of blasphemy.
I feel like I have so much to sort out concerning the roles each parent plays in my life. It's incredibly hard to know how to navigate a situation like this without feeling like you'll hurt someone in the process. My growing relationship with Lisa has partially coincided with huge shifts in my relationship with my parents. I suppose this makes a lot of sense, but I certainly didn't set out to redeem my strained relationship with them by engaging Lisa. The more Lisa and I opened up to each other, the more trust and understanding grew in our relationship, and the more I wanted to draw close to her. It just happened naturally.
Through Lisa, I now understand things about my personality and my nature that I never did before. For the first time in my life, the threads of nature and nurture are untangling and becoming clearer - the lines are no longer as blurry as they used to be.
Some people say the heart's capacity for love is unlimited. I believe this extends to loving multiple parents, even if it's in different (and ever-evolving) ways.